GENTLEMEN, HOLD YOUR FIRE: Sexual Intercourse Tips

MAXIMIZE YOUR STAMINA – AND HER SATISFACTION – TONIGHT

In 1966, the four-phase theory of sexual arousal debuted with the publication of Masters and Johnson’s Human Sexual Response. That seminal playbook still applies – but recent research makes your job of charting a course to the top even easier. Read on, and bone up.

Phase I: Excitement

Her: Turns out that both men’s and women’s bodies need 11 minutes to reach peak arousal, according to a Canadian study. But the mind is more fickle. At the University of Las Vegas, researchers found that women are 11 percent more prone to distractions that men. Her number one sex buzz kills. Seeing her own body. “Free her mind of insecurities with specific compliments, and her body – and passions – will follow, “says Sari Locker, PhD, author of The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Amazing Sex.

Him: Take is slow now to buy time later, says Patti Britton, PhD, author of The Art of Sex Coaching. Use your hands and lips to awaken her neck, back, and inner thighs before moving toward her erogenous zones. And let her bring your body into the game instead of seeking stimulation yourself.

Phase II: Plateau

Her: The plateau phase is her arousal base camp. The trick is to prepare properly for the ascent. “If you race through this phase, you won’t build up tension, so her orgasm will be less intense, “says Emily Nagoski, PhD, a sexuality educator at West Chester University in Pennsylvania. Use this stage to deliver focused, steady attention to her clitoris. “Stimulating anywhere else at this point is like going to Minnesota to get a tan.”

 Him: At this stage, your diaphragm, which speeds your arousal momentum toward orgasm? “Negate by focusing on slowing your breathing. This relaxes your diaphragm and prolongs your stay in the plateau phase.

Phase III: Orgasmic

Her: The closer a woman is to orgasm the easier it can be for her to lose it. Changing positions or altering your rhythm and depth at this point might send you back to stage one.

Him: Buy time by concentrating on what your other body parts are doing (your arms holding you up, your legs flexing). This doesn’t just distract, it ramps up your body awareness and control, says Nagoski. “But,” she says, “Once you cross the point of no return, climax becomes a reflex, just like sneezing.”

Phase IV: Resolution

Her: Women can jump into round two almost immediately, says Locker. If she’s up for it, move your finger in wide circles just surrounding her now supersensitive clitoris until she’s ready for more direct stimulation.

Him: Stress and orgasm trigger the release of the hormone prolactin, which stalls your ability to rise again. Once, the prolactin level in your blood ebbs, the refractory period ends. This can take minutes or days. The more stressed you are, the longer it’ll take. So, at the very least, don’t sweat your post-sex downtime. Instead, start satisfying her and soon you’ll be ready for a rematch.